what’s social/unsocial?

The term “social design” is one that I like kicking around like a soccer ball, hogging it and trying to score on a net with 5 defenders tackling me. I just want to hurt the goalie –  don’t even want to score.

I don’t know why I always use sports as a metaphor for relating to design — I think competition is the first thing that comes to my mind and I can’t help but to write about it

We weren’t “un”social the past two centuries. We were/are growing. We had curiosity and passion mold us to who we are today. We are wise idiots. Nothing but tools, running around, looking, trying to fit into society. There is no such thing as “social” design. Design is a social act. All that we have been making, all that we’ve been striving for and all that we’ve been believing in, dies as soon as we conduct this act.

Now, you may ask, how do you know if a design is dead? Well, that’s why you study, train and practice. You are supposed to be responsible enough to educate yourself and use the resources you have available. I feel sorry for our brains to have to adapt to this techno-funk society, but information exchange and communities determine what is dead and what is emerging. Our  tools for communication have exponentially transformed our lifestyles over the last few decades and we have yet to understand where we are headed at this speed.

The point I’m trying to make is that there is no such thing as social design. If you are not passionate about something; if you’re not facing your fears; if you’re not balancing your selfishness and your selflessness; if you are not trying to understand relationships — most importantly local ones — you are not designing yourself and you are most certainly afraid of failure. This means that there is no perfection and you are in constant change as your experiences define your individuality and your fate.

It’s all nature, let it be. Don’t let anyone tell you what is good — but listen. They don’t know you and want you to be safe based on their understanding of safety. It’s all competition, if you don’t want to battle and feel what love is about, then you’ll never know what you have the potential to kill or save. Predator, prey and play came from nature too. We were never wrong, we have always been social and we shall continue to design. Let nature do its thing.

Just feel the love and spread it. Own your creative body — don’t sell it.

Filed under: design

how to keep creative

Make, move, make, move, make, move — nothing needs you for too long unless you are in love and/or have kids, and even then, you can still make and move. Help as many people as you can by providing service. But when I say too long, I mean stop when you’re full. By full I don’t mean your hopes and dreams — I mean pride and acceptance. By that I don’t mean give up — I mean stop and think about longevity and sutainability. By lasting I don’t mean doing what you’re told to survive  – I mean keep your spirit alive. By spirit I don’t mean God — I mean your self.

Train yourself to be creative because if you don’t, you’ll just miss out on reality. It’s all moving — just catch it when it comes and roll with it baby (yes, you are a baby). The only home you got is in your heart and the only thing that distinguishes you is your creativity. Practice moving around. By that I don’t mean travel the world — I mean face your fears and challenge your comfort.

That’s how you keep creative.

Filed under: creativity, design, life, philosophy

do good: be bad to yourself

That’s right, I mean it. If you want to do any good, you have to beat yourself up. It’s pretty easy though, just be a normal human being and strive for conquering the world. Why not aim to be the king, queen, prince or princess? To get to the top, you have to fight for it. What, you thought you could just climb the ladder, step by step, go higher and higher and you’ll get to the top of some roof and from there you can see other roofs and you’ll be happy sitting on top of roofs, chillin’ having a beer?

Well, sure, the ladder is meant to get you up. Everyone’s solution of what to use to get you up is to get a ladder. What if the ladder was never there? What if it wasn’t so easy to get up? What if all you had was your body and the urge to climb? You might find some tools and dig at making some steps, or call over a friend to lift you up, or make a rope somehow. Did I even mention what it is that you are trying to climb? I leave that up to you. Do you even need to climb? Who am I to tell you that you need to climb?

Design is the same way.

We’re talking about doing good, being good, yadi yadi ya. Come on people. What is good? Having a big house for my family in 2 cities and 3 beaches so my children can appreciate a wealthy life full of joy and no worry for money? Or, is good working in a non-profit organization, making ads for anti-poverty campaigns? Who is anyone to tell me what is good for me? The only good I know of is my strive for improvement on every level in my life. The only good I know is when I don’t listen to people around me who think they know what is good for me, and for themselves. The only good I know is when I listen to everyone and make my own decision on what is good for me, for others, and act on it.

So much for social design. I say kick yourself in the ass for not doing what you are capable of doing. That’s how you do good.

Filed under: design

one life: make money to save yourself; make art to save the world

I’m sitting here on my bed with my 3 year-old Apple Powerbook — one of the old ones that has no Intel chip or Super Drive. I’ve forgotten how old I’ve become. I was in school with so much drive for social design. I must admit though, my drive made me super aggressive. Not very attractive. Is it?

I’m unemployed by choice at the moment.

Oh my! Unemployed? That’s such a disgrace to my education and my strive for being great. What a failure, right?

Sure. Why not call it a failure? I’m so tired of thinking that I’ve got the final answer and living up to my own super expectations. I haven’t been able to sleep well because of all this “design” thinking. The internet and my stupid laptop make it so easy for me to forget who I am. I’ve had so much of good and bad in my life and lost sense of what is important for my health and well-being.

I never wanted to save the world. I have no idea where it suddenly came from. Maybe because I was angry at everyone. As if I knew something that others didn’t and I would hide and pretend like I didn’t think I was better than everyone else. Maybe all I really wanted was a companion, to really get it, and do it with me; to save the world together and use the internet to spread it.

I’m lost.

Because after all that I have done, after standing up for what I believed was right, I admit that I’m a selfish girl and everyone else is selfish too, especially the ones that deny their selfishness.

I jumped into a neighbourhood and stood still for a year. I listened to everything. It was chaos. I began to see the design of a local community and how complicated and interconnected it was. I realized that people all matter and every person thinks that they matter more. I started to see what “social” really meant. And I just designed on my way. By design I mean doing things that I was capable of doing.

I’m not going to lie or brag, but I’m a social cat. I love talking to people — from CEOs to the homeless. It’s the most enjoyable thing for me and that was something I only realized after I got out of school. I was more than lost in school, I was free. I could do anything I wanted but knew that I had to figure out the “world” part when I got out of school and I couldn’t waste any time. So speed became me and I hurt myself that way.

No regrets.

I realized that designing networks is all that matters. Networks = people. Connect people and you’ve done social design. And if you really are full of creativity, love and passion like myself, please practice it as an art. Just make art. I don’t know what your art is, but mine is poetry. I feel free when I do it. So, do something that will make you honor yourself. Put your heart out for the world to see. Don’t shove it down people’s throat, don’t say you’re right, don’t make people feel like they’re stupid and please don’t talk about how there is a final answer “somewhere” out there. Make money to save yourself; make art to save the world. You have one life and people care about who you are if you care enough for yourself to craft something beautiful and share it.  Art is something you do for free, for yourself, for exploration, for discovery. Art is the universe in your voice. 

Who knows?

Maybe you’ll make lots of money with your art one day!

Filed under: creativity, design, education, experience, life, love

the mark of unity

everything will

come together

with chance

and choice

 

balanced

and designed

with integrity 

and hope

 

yes

we can

Filed under: art, community, creativity, design, education, experience, future, life, love, philosophy, poetry, politics, social community networks, sustainability, work

revolution finished

 

GOD and HUMAN

MOTHER and NATURE

CHICKEN and EGG

MAN and ROOSTER

INVENTOR and INNOVATION

can’t go backwards

LIFE is always forward

and equal.

 

be born

re-birth

revolution

sex

acceptance

Filed under: activism, art, city, community, creativity, cycling, design, education, experience, future, humanity, iran, life, love, music, nature, philosophy, poetry, politics, school, student life, sustainability, work

love, violence and mastering the joy of design

Design. Oh design how I love you. I hate you so much because my love for you makes me hate myself. I love being a designer but I hate design. I love designing but I hate talking about it. I love talking but I hate people who talk so much. I hate designers but I love to master designing. I am a designer, I love people. I am a designer, I am people. I am passionate and violent, I make and destroy. I want to be a revolution. I am a designer, I am.

Crazy am I? 

A little girl who came to Toronto from Tehran, leaving her childhood in the land of fertility. Iran with my mother. Iran with my father. Iran with my brother. I just ran far away from everything, out to explore a new reality. 

I tried to define myself so many times. I fell in love easily. Not with boys. No, boys didn’t come into the picture until late in the game. I fell in love with the energy of joy. Joy was all I ever wanted, really. Am I any different from you for craving joy? It was my best friend and I’m sure you are best friends too.

First joy came into my life through the piano. Memorizing notes and completion free of mistakes was joy. I took lessons for a year and learnt all the notes. My teacher loved me and she said I was a great student. I started hating it though. I hated it so I beat myself knowing I wasn’t going to be the best at mastering piano. It made me mad. Others were better, I just wasn’t good enough.

So I left piano and found joy again through sport. It was the start of a very long and brutal relationship. We broke up many times. Joy wasn’t very nice to me, even though I visibly invested energy into joy over anything else. I gave my heart away for the joy of sport. I cried when winning, cried when losing. I would practice for joy. But I hated myself! I hated not being able to master it. I would try so hard but  got rejected so many times. Sport wanted it to work too but demanded too much from me. I felt like shit. I felt like I was trying hard and not getting mutual love in return – like as if he could never understand my love for him. I now think the reason for our breakup was because I wanted to master the sport over mastering the joy of the sport. Through my process of mastering, I killed my joy in sport. Others were better, I just wasn’t good enough. I broke my own heart.

The computer. Oh the joy of the computer was there for as long as I can remember. Commodore 64 in Iran was the favourite childhood toy. Gaming was joy. We came to Canada in 1996 and the computer became more embedded in our lives since my dad had always been ahead with computers and software. My brother and I had the advantage of being raised with computers. I still remember the dial-up days, with Yahoo Chat and ICQ. Not that many people in middle school were tech saavy back then. I still remember the computer labs very limited with their computers programs and barely any of them had access to internet. All-the-Right-Type was a speed-typing program that I will never forget. I had a joy for mastering that too. Type fast! Free of mistakes! That was joy.

What about art? Well drawing was fun. I liked drawing things. But hell no, I was by no means the best artist. I was decent but it didn’t give me deep joy and I never thought about doing any masterpieces. I didn’t draw for fun for that long. I forced myself to do it because I wanted to master it. I couldn’t. I wanted to draw from my imagination, but couldn’t. Someway or another, I ended up in a program that was starting in a middle school called CyberARTS. My grade 6 teachers recommended that I go there. So I got in. I think that’s when my life began to take shape. I started dating art and computer fun, but I was still in love with the joy of sports.

From grade 7 to grade 12 (1998 – 2004), I continued getting to know computers and art. I was already in the pot to become a graphic designer. I had no choice, it picked me. Graphic software was fun for me to learn. It was a new language and I loved being given projects to work on using that language. I learnt so much about the life through the process of each project.

Writing? Well as you can see I enjoy doing it. Writing to me has always been the best way to express myself and articulate my thoughts. Writing was a joy for as long as I can remember. Did I ever dream of being a writer? Nope. Did I ever want to master writing? To some degree, but it didn’t bother me as much as my other mastering obsessions. I viewed it as a tool to be creative and expressive. It wasn’t until this past summer when I took a Creative Writing course (after OCAD told me I needed to take one last credit to graduate) that I confessed to myself I am a poet. Lillian Allen empowered me. She told me I had it. She said it to my face. I didn’t take my English teachers seriously in highschool when they would give me high marks and lots of comments on my writing. My grade 11 teacher used to go crazy over the poems I wrote in her class. I just never thought it was worth anything. I liked doing it for myself. It was my method of becoming my own teacher and mentor.

When the athlete in me died, I was dead. I knew I had to fall in love again. So I gave it all to graphic design. I’m free baby. I’m out to love you. I had 4 years of professional loving at Ontario Collage of Art & Design to master the joy of design. I did it, and quite well actually. I mastered the joy of design and I’d like to take this time to thank myself for mastering this joy. I could not have mastered this joy if I didn’t love myself. So I thank me for loving myself and staying in this relationship. I continue to call myself a professional graphic designer but I thank myself for realizing that I am by no means the best at anything. Because the only thing I am is me. And that is the story I just told you.

I am love.

I seek the joy of mastering design because I am Ghazaleh. I want to learn. I want to apply my learning and I like to use my brain. I don’t want to be the best at anything that confines me because I want to be free of order. I want to do what I want to do, when I want to do it. I learnt that being a graphic designer is a privilege so I used it to my advantage. I threw myself out to the world with it. Here I am world! I design!

I could have never learnt more about myself by letting go of what I thought was best for me. I broke up many many times. But I was me. I had only me, my two eyes, ears, and my gut. I went to Florida with it, Chicago, New York, UN headquarters and even the MIT and Harvard campuses, on my own two feet with my own money. I admitted that I had some things to figure out.

Here I am now. 2009. What can I tell you?

I am Ghazaleh, the girl you always knew — doing what I want, designing from what I learn. Because design is beyond what you ever thought was real. Design is the process of mastering joy for people. So in order to master the joy of design, you have to design for people, constantly. Design is the ultimate creative force in each human being. Design means taking responsibility to make something that impacts those who interact with it. Whether its one person, a neighbourhood, or a nation, design is not an object – it is energy. It’s not what you make but the people who it resides in. It is people.

Be a designer. Listen. Look. Think. Link. Plan. Do…and never stop.

The fancier you think you are, the further away you drift from being a real designer. Stay true. Stay real. Find joy. Suck it up and fight for it. You have to be mean to win the grand prize. And winning the grand prize of mastering joy takes a lot of designing, even the grand prize itself.

Filed under: design, education, experience, life, problem solving, student life

waste vs live

i don’t waste my life trying to prove i am right.
i live my life doing what feels right.

Filed under: activism, design, education, life, love, philosophy, work , philosophy

what Time is it?

So now that I’ve revealed my disbelief in Time, I should at least make some sense of the theory of relativity and science in regards to this matter.

I don’t believe in perfection, absolutes or even words being the best way to define Nature. Nature is nature. Can nature talk, write, pay your bills, or tell you what you need to do to get a good paying job? No, I don’t think Nature had a clue that that’s what humans cherished in life. Nature is God. I don’t care who you are or what you think. Nature is God. It’s simple, I’ll say it again: Nature is God. All together now: “NATURE IS GOD.”

Good.

So now that we have that straight, why are we trying to define Nature through Science and God through Religion? Science and Religion are systems designed by humans to break apart Nature and God and make them more complex. I don’t blame us though – we are Humans. It is Human Nature to be inquisitive and since we have Nature in Human Nature, we are naturally responsive to our Body and Mind. Our Senses are what keep us alive and guide us to happiness.

It is Time to:

1. Follow your Senses through Body and Mind
2. Accept Nature as God
3. Experience the naturally inquisitive Human Nature respond to Nature

Assuming you could live a whole century and witness society develop decade by decade, at some point you’ll realize that you were always a child and no one listened to you, not even you. All you really wanted to do was play, and no one thought it was the right thing to do, especially the people who loved you dearly. So you didn’t even dare to, because it was Time that was holding you back. It was your fear of Time and everyone else’s proof of Time that stopped you. You started something, it didn’t go well, and you thought it wasn’t the right Time. So you beat yourself and cried inside. “No one gets what I’m trying to do!” You brushed it off and went back to being afraid.

It’s time to let go of Time and let it only be determined by the impact of what you have done. You take it out of you, put it out there, and see what sticks and what doesn’t. You enjoy the stickies — they can get you a little high. Sometimes they can get you too high and you might loose your head. The one’s that didn’t stick are your friends too, and they came to fight for their right. You love the stickies so much that you may forget what was in you in the first place and what you were trying to do. But that’s not Time! That’s learning by doing! It’s called research, art, poetry, design, activism, development, growth — it’s all of those things that are simply experienced. It’s not slow, or fast, it just gets determined by how much you do and how many people you tag on the way.

Play tag. It’s time to play tag!

You’re It!

Filed under: creativity, design, experience, humanity, life, love, philosophy, work

OCAD is done…or, has just begun (part 4)

 

June 2008 - Convocation Ceremony

I turn 22 tomorrow. I usually don’t tell people my age, but it’s revealed at some point and there’s nothing I can really do about it. Age speaks for the time your body has physically existed but age and time in my eyes can only be measured through experience.

 

The experience of living the last two years of my life, has been deep, eventful, empowering and more specifically out of my control. Everything that has happened to me and I have done has taken on its own life. My maturity as a designer and an ambitious student has expanded my level of confidence to heights beyond limits, a life of its own.

I feel like I’ve been incubating for these 2 years with the desire to give birth to a creation of accumulated knowledge from sifting through information, running up and down hills and flying over the oceans and deserts. I feel like I’ve been waiting for so long to get to somewhere where I can stop and show where I am.

The reason I know this, is because I can finally let go. Without letting go, there is always worry, defense, pressure and a sense of failure always embedded in my head. This has caused me stress to the degree where my body has forgotten how to operate to fulfill itself and manage its own actions, without letting the actions control my body. I never let go. I kept wanting more and I always will.

My thesis became me. I wanted to make a revolution as a designer and so determined to do it. I didn’t really know what it looked like but I knew what it was supposed to feel like and finally I can say that I’m done. I’m done incubating because I can firmly say that I have lived it, revealed it and put it to the test for people to interact with. Its working and I know it will last. I’ve achieved my goal of reaching the destination I was heading for. It’s time for me to enjoy it and let it move forward – the intense work is done. My thesis grew to a shared vision of people around me, and together we have made it an interactive design. Success is when others see potential in what you are doing and want to help you get there. Collective power is the only way ideas come to life.

 

more to come…

Filed under: creativity, design, life, student life