the mark of unity

everything will

come together

with chance

and choice

 

balanced

and designed

with integrity 

and hope

 

yes

we can

Filed under: art, community, creativity, design, education, experience, future, life, love, philosophy, poetry, politics, social community networks, sustainability, work

revolution finished

 

GOD and HUMAN

MOTHER and NATURE

CHICKEN and EGG

MAN and ROOSTER

INVENTOR and INNOVATION

can’t go backwards

LIFE is always forward

and equal.

 

be born

re-birth

revolution

sex

acceptance

Filed under: activism, art, city, community, creativity, cycling, design, education, experience, future, humanity, iran, life, love, music, nature, philosophy, poetry, politics, school, student life, sustainability, work

waste vs live

i don’t waste my life trying to prove i am right.
i live my life doing what feels right.

Filed under: activism, design, education, life, love, philosophy, work , philosophy

what Time is it?

So now that I’ve revealed my disbelief in Time, I should at least make some sense of the theory of relativity and science in regards to this matter.

I don’t believe in perfection, absolutes or even words being the best way to define Nature. Nature is nature. Can nature talk, write, pay your bills, or tell you what you need to do to get a good paying job? No, I don’t think Nature had a clue that that’s what humans cherished in life. Nature is God. I don’t care who you are or what you think. Nature is God. It’s simple, I’ll say it again: Nature is God. All together now: “NATURE IS GOD.”

Good.

So now that we have that straight, why are we trying to define Nature through Science and God through Religion? Science and Religion are systems designed by humans to break apart Nature and God and make them more complex. I don’t blame us though – we are Humans. It is Human Nature to be inquisitive and since we have Nature in Human Nature, we are naturally responsive to our Body and Mind. Our Senses are what keep us alive and guide us to happiness.

It is Time to:

1. Follow your Senses through Body and Mind
2. Accept Nature as God
3. Experience the naturally inquisitive Human Nature respond to Nature

Assuming you could live a whole century and witness society develop decade by decade, at some point you’ll realize that you were always a child and no one listened to you, not even you. All you really wanted to do was play, and no one thought it was the right thing to do, especially the people who loved you dearly. So you didn’t even dare to, because it was Time that was holding you back. It was your fear of Time and everyone else’s proof of Time that stopped you. You started something, it didn’t go well, and you thought it wasn’t the right Time. So you beat yourself and cried inside. “No one gets what I’m trying to do!” You brushed it off and went back to being afraid.

It’s time to let go of Time and let it only be determined by the impact of what you have done. You take it out of you, put it out there, and see what sticks and what doesn’t. You enjoy the stickies — they can get you a little high. Sometimes they can get you too high and you might loose your head. The one’s that didn’t stick are your friends too, and they came to fight for their right. You love the stickies so much that you may forget what was in you in the first place and what you were trying to do. But that’s not Time! That’s learning by doing! It’s called research, art, poetry, design, activism, development, growth — it’s all of those things that are simply experienced. It’s not slow, or fast, it just gets determined by how much you do and how many people you tag on the way.

Play tag. It’s time to play tag!

You’re It!

Filed under: creativity, design, experience, humanity, life, love, philosophy, work

i care to DO

I’m frustrated with everything and I’m only saying this because I believe that I have answers for how to find the answers. I have a voice that I’ve made through listening and thinking. My voice is of DOING. I have a voice that cares to voice others because the voice of others is my voice.

I have never fit in, nor have I ever thought I had to fit in. Now people look at me and think that I’m too young to have answers, but I’m not telling you that I’M THE ANSWER, I’m telling you I know where the answers are and I care enough about them to bring them to the forefront of the conversation if we’re talking about answers. So don’t get intimidated by me or think that I’m self-indulgent. I just love what I DO because I do it for people and communities, hence I should love myself for doing it. I want to share the love with you all. You might see tears in my eyes if you catch me in a passionate conversation.

I just got home to my parent’s Thornhill condo suite, after a very important panel lecture series Manufacturing Neighbourhoods held by Toronto’s Architecture for Humanity at the Gardner Museum. The panel speakers included Bruce Hinds (my professor, close friend and project supporter) along with the highly reputable Ken Greenberg and other engaged reputable speakers just as concerned about community development in Toronto.

I thought it was a wonderful discussion and I just had to put my foot in there and talk about community activism since I know what that is about, because I practice it and preach it simultaneously. Sitting in the front row and having my hand up since the floor could ask questions, being dismissed about 5 times before the moderator came to hand me the microphone, I spilled my heart out on this topic of ‘building community’.

I’ve been at OCAD for 4 years and I have involved myself in its community and politics — because I care about making it a better institution with better education, more exposure to its possibilities and direction for building a unique community. Bottom line, I’m telling you, I know OCAD because I’ve experienced it and I care about its future. Everyone on the administration knows me. I have made myself and my voice visible, fearless and passionate. I have tried my best to speak for the majority of the population of the school and enhancement of its education for its students precisely with ‘building community’ and increasing student engagement, which mind you is not any different than doing something for a neighborhood. I have DONE things and that goes to tell you that I can speak about them and have a right to make a statement after doing something that people care about and don’t care enough to do something about.

Here is proof ONE and TWO of what I have done. Boom. Done. I’m publicizing myself because no one else on earth is going to do it for me. It’s not just two, it’s more! I care about my gradshow, so I care to get involved in making a structure for it so that the students are involved in the future. I put myself through challenges and hours of volunteering to initiate something I believe in. I care about the decisions made for the school. I care to speak up and give an input, because if I don’t, no one will know that I actually care. I want a better future for others and if I don’t act on what matters, then what matters will never have my voice in it. I know my voice creates vibrations and it’s those vibrations that I believe in, nothing else.

I’m fed up with people who don’t DO and sit and complain and complain and complain. There are people who talk about doing, tons of them might I add. In fact, that’s all we do! We (as in majority of Western society) just talk about doing and then the next time we do the same thing again. As much as I whole-heartedly agree the doing begins by having a conversation, but what about making the conversation HAPPEN? Who wants to take responsibility of that and who wants to invest their time in something that they’ve never done? Stop watching your damn television and stop listening to how hard it is to do things. It’s all built to scare you and turn you away. You’re not MEANT to have a voice; that’s what you’re meant for through the media.

Media yourself for goodness sakes! I’m a nobody and I’m media-ing me and through that I want to media my values and beliefs. Does that make sense? Ofcourse not, because you’ve never heard of it. You think that media is supposed to come to you because media is so far away and hard to reach.

It’s not though; it’s really not. Internet confuses us, because we’re confused with ourselves so when we enter a digital world with confusion of ourselves, we are even more confused and don’t know how to translate anything into reality. Hence we talk about it.

I’m also working on a community project as you should know by now if you’ve talked to me or know me, because it’s really my life. You cannot do a community project if you don’t fall in love with the community. It simply will not work. You will fail miserably and become pessimistic about doing anything ever again. I’m in love with this project and I’m in love with it because (here we go again), I simply GIVE A DAMN. Research on an area with statistics, numbers, assumptions and politics is the easy part. Understanding what the community has to offer is the most important and the most time-consuming part. This requires listening, observing, making friends and showing appreciation for what exists. If you don’t show appreciation for what is already there, you will again, fail miserably and continue to go the wrong way to make change.

Here is the link to a brief description to TheStoreFront project and here is TheStoreFrontCommunity.com which I highly suggest you join if you are in Toronto since we are holding an inaugural festival in the area: The BIG Festival. I have now understood this community, and I realize still how little I know about what is going on and I’m dying to be a part of it — this is why I want to MOVE THERE and live there and experience the community — being a member of the community that I change.

Now what else have I done? I spoke up to this community! I clearly made the effort to show that I cared about them. I’ve understood what community groups exist. I KNOW who these people are now and they KNOW ME TOO! This is how you make a change! You come in as an outsider and see it your responsibility to be humble and listen. If you want to be a therapist — which is literally what urban planners and designers are for communities at large — you need to listen and understand. You need to realize that there are no fingers to be pointed. It is your responsibility to find out how to do it so that IT WORKS and that local residents and businesses ‘take ownership of their communities’ — the answer to the question Bruce Hinds proposed to the group.

Now listen to me, I’m telling you that I’ve done this and done the investigation alone. And I can speak about it for that very reason; because I have done it and I know how it needs to be done after going through difficulty figuring it out. I’m not done and I never will be, but I hope that someone listens and follows some of these steps that I’ve learnt by DOING what you’re TALKING about. Who am I kidding, no one will buy in until it’s all over the media, and then you can come and ask me, “how do you do it?” Ask me now because I’m always in the search for answers. Maybe what I say will be of value, despite my age.

Filed under: activism, community, design, education, life, love, problem solving, student life, sustainability, work

THESIS: 1.5 years – action time!

I’ve finally got it. After a year and a half of process, I’ve finally reached the process of execution, which will be a long and challenging process — I’m all up for it. It came out of last week’s thesis meeting with my prof Keith Rushton and in particular from Brian’s challenge — a former student of Keith’s working in the industry, who sits in on our meetings. I’m not saying that he revealed anything specifically, but he did make a spark go off. He challenged me to a point where I began to question my presentation for the grad show. I instantly rethought everything for my approach.

Brian said, “Web2.0 is dead in a couple months.” As much as I can argue and articulate what Web2.0 really means and explain O’Reilley’s 7 principles to inform people on the definition of the term, I realized that he had a great point.

My thesis is not about Web2.0, and particularly, I do not want people to have any preconceived thoughts on what my thesis is about. Immediately people will think about the social community networks that already exist on the web before they comprehend the intelligence behind my research and purpose.

I told myself, “You do ‘not’ want to be be compared to anything that is out there, so don’t present yourself that way and don’t set yourself up for that.”

The thesis started off with my vision for the web being used positively to connect people. The more I researched into it, the more I bookmarked social web, and the more I read about Web2.0 tools, theories, essays, opinions and research in technology, the more knowledgeable I became on how to measure success.

For over a year, all I did was research the web and read about the web. I bookmarked dozens of websites, rewrote my statement dozens of times, and exposed my thoughts to dozens of people, vocally repeating my purpose. The idea evolved, the focus changed, the strategies fluctuated, the passion transformed and the true purpose revealed itself to me through ongoing projects, involvements, and reflective experiential research. I am using my thesis to provide a unique and thorough experience through interaction and sharing of knowledge using a model that I create as a framework to facilitate productivity and interconnectivity.

Filed under: design, life, problem solving, school, social community networks, student life, work

Insane pragmatist

Look, I know I’m a workaholic – I know that. You want to know why? I don’t know why! I think I’m insane. Not literally though — I’m not psychotic or schizophrenic, but I do have some traits that I think make me insane. What do I mean by sane? Well, maybe normal is a good word in this case. I really don’t think I’m normal. Sometime I wish I was. Sometimes I wish I didn’t always see so much. I don’t have any super powers either; I’m just like another girl when you see me on the street or catch me at some party. I’m physically normal and I’m quiet when I observe. I see potential in everything I concern myself with. I get active and I do it because I’ve seen results and have built confidence in myself.

I don’t try to be different. I don’t think you are different if you ‘try’ to be different. I just do what I believe I’m capable of doing. How will I ever do anything if I don’t think I’m capable of doing it?

I don’t know why I see the future so much.

The other day I asked  myself, “Where am i?”, and I couldn’t answer myself. I don’t know anything, I really don’t. And it’s this unknown that keeps me going. I think what makes me insane is that I don’t get mad — it’s just stopped. I do get mad, as in go crazy and intense, but I don’t get upset to a point where I feel negatively about something. It’s just stopped.

I’m a pragmatist because I know how to get things done. I trust myself and don’t worry about doing. I’m not an idealist. I’m insane and I’m pragmatic when it comes to action. Now, what the hell does this all mean? Why do I think that I’m insane? I just sense it. I’ve experienced this insane feeling when I speak to people, or write, or come up with an idea and get serious about doing it. I don’t know what people think of me when I’m in action. I don’t really care. I care ‘about’ people but I don’t concern myself about ‘what they think of me’. I used to — I used to care so much about that.

I don’t know why I can’t be normal. Why the fuck can I not be normal? I get sick of it sometimes. I don’t even know who I am — I don’t know what is in me; I don’t know what drives me. I know I’m a human being but I’ve realized that there really is a higher power that is running me — it’s beyond my control. Once it’s been ignited, I’ve not been the driver. I don’t even want to say ‘I’. Who the hell is ‘I’? Why ‘I’ anyway? What the hell does the letter ‘I’ have anything to do with me?

Can I pick which ‘I’ I am? I mean, what if an evening I’m one ‘I’ and the next evening I’m another ‘I’? What if I mold my ‘I’ to ‘You’ (or ‘U’)? Isn’t that still me? I just simply don’t get it. I’ve been asking myself these ‘I’ question since I was 9. When I look in the mirror, I see something I don’t recognize. I hate the damn mirror because it mistakes who I am. What the fuck is it about image? Why do I hate it so much but love it at the same time? I hate looking at myself because what I see is not me. It’s the ‘me’ that others see with their two eyes — the two eyes that can only see physical existence. So my image is me?

Now, how old am I? I think I’m ancient. Oh, well my body, my physical body, is pretty young in the human years. But me, ME — I’m not young. Wisdom has no age. I am what I always was and will always be what I’ve always been — that is how old I am. My soul is who I am. My soul drives me. My soul is me. Now how old is my soul? Well who the fuck can answer that question, huh?

Filed under: life, philosophy, work

diary blog

It’s been quite a while since I’ve written an update on my work / school / thesis / life more or less because I’ve been so incredibly consumed by its intensity so far. However, it’s not a reason for me to stop writing on my blog that’s meant to be my personal diary. I’ve always loved diaries. I started keeping one when I was in Iran for a few months — this is me in grade 4. Then when we came to Canada it took me a while to get back into the idea of writing reflections of my experiences. I got back into it after my best friend in highschool, who was an inspiration to me since we met, gave me a book and signed the inside with encouraging words to keep me writing poems and memories.

So, I’ve been writing way before blogs came about and I keep a sketchbook full of words and notes — I call it my thought book. This blog on the internet is just an extension of what I have already been doing but now it’s exposed to the world because I think a) it’s important to share your life and experiences, b) it’s important to use the internet in a positive way and c) why hide anything? I’m an honest genuine person and you will see that when you meet me in person, so why should I not share my process and progress in life with the world? Sure, I can put up a bunch of links to cool sites and reflect on the news, but that’s not who I am and that’s not what I see as my purpose of keeping a blog. I collect thoughts; I collect ideas; I collect information and I collect designs. I highlight and highlight and I connect and connect. I talk and talk and I share and share. I love and love and I give and give. Whatever it may be to you — it’s me. So me to you is whatever you see, feel or remember from what I leave behind for you.

A diary is precious — it’s the process of your life. Documentation gets you far and archiving gives people proof of what you’ve done. The only way you can down track anything in your life is if you document it. You can take photos, record videos, audio, draw, paint, build and of course WRITE.Memory is not something that exists — it’s something that gets documented and becomes history. History is only legitimately history if it’s archived, otherwise there is no way anyone will every have any proof to show that that, whatever it may be, actually existed.We have free space; we have access to information; we have freedom of speech; freedom to broadcast ourselves; and we have the world in our hands. What’s the problem? We don’t use it to its full potential.

There is no more NEW — the NEW is working with what is there to do something with meaning, with empathy and with purpose to solve all the problems we have. Sharing is great — but lets share our methods to problems; lets come together and be real about our weaknesses and honest about our love.I’ve been going through a lot and learning so much this year — hopefully I will take more time to reflect on them and document them on my blog as I continue with life.If you check my site out in the new year, I should have all sorts of new things to show so you can see what I’ve really been up to.

Filed under: humanity, life, love, philosophy, student life, work

from design to me

I think I’m not a designer. I think I can design but I don’t think I like that label. I say that I’m a poet and philosopher, but those don’t even fit me because I’m not practicing either one — I’m not educated enough in those fields to call myself that. I’m not a spectacular designer by any means. I think there are so many other designers that do much cooler things and have a lot more talent and skill both by hand and the computer. I think a lot and I like people. I enjoy the company of others as much as I enjoy the company of myself, but I also like to help others. Sure, I can do that being a designer but that word design itself makes me think graphic designer, then I compare my work to other people’s work and then it becomes all about who has more talent. I don’t think I’m the only designer that thinks about design and comparison. I think people are in a constant mode of comparing themselves to others and lose sense of who they really are.

I like what I like and that’s words. I like words, letters, sounds, sentences, paragraphs, statements, books and I like it when people talk and express themselves. I like it when people are open and people care. I like when people smile and ask questions because they are interested and they comment and voice their opinion. I like rhythm: I like poems, lyrics that communicate an idea, rhymes, spoken word. I like writing: the interplay of words with meaning and objective. I like to make sense. I like to understand. I like to know and learn and do. I really do. So, why should I just call myself a designer? I don’t understand why I should do that. Would people know that I like all that stuff when I say I’m a designer?

And, I like all that cool stuff too. I love those edgy, eye catching, funny, vibrant extremely well executed and refined pieces of work and their presentation. But why is it that I don’t want to be that? I don’t want to be like what’s going on out there in the front line of design and even if I wanted to, I couldn’t because my heart isn’t there. I just follow my heart — I really do. I’m pretty passionate about everything I end up doing and I make those decisions. I’m in charge of those decisions where my heart will enjoy what it feels.

What I know now is I just love people. I’m a happy person and all I really want to do is make a difference and contribute to a difference. I really really care about people and I’m interested in everyone I meet. And I choose to meet those people for who they really are. I like changing the way people perceive things by setting an example — which is by doing. If I don’t do it, no one will know what it is that I want to do or hope to do or have thought about doing…no one. It actually doesn’t matter at all, unless you do it. Then you can explain what you did and people will say, “whoa, you did that…you have guts man”. Yes, it’s about the risk. I live a life of seeking to find joy in everything and I can do that because I…

a) don’t watch tv
b) don’t go shopping
c) don’t compare myself to an idealogy
d) spend a lot of time to myself
e) talk to a lot of people
f) ask a lot of questions
g) spend time thinking about my work and what it means to me and it’s reason for making
h) listen to a lot of people

Most important thing is…I don’t even think I’m living a healthy life. My room is a mess, I have a million things I think about, I don’t spend enough time with my family eventhough I live with them. I put my work first — which is where my passion lies and I don’t do some of the basic things in life, like organize stuff or read more of the books that I have and actually schedule my time properly. I’m addicted to the Internet and I hate it because I love it. I sometimes just stare at the screen and repeat going to the same sites and I don’t even do any work. I don’t go to the gym, I don’t play any more sports like I used to years ago and I don’t

I wish this and I wish that. I wish and I forget I have. I wish people did and I wish people cared more to do. I wish I stopped writing about and thinking about what I think I should do and just do it. I wish I knew how to stop thinking about everythign at once and I wish that I stopped being so hard on myself…

Wait, I don’t know if I want all of that…

Maybe that’s why I’m writing instead of doing what I should be doing.

I think if you relate or you have something that you’d like to admit about yourself, you should reply to this because I would like to hear it and I’m sure others would too.

Filed under: design, life, work

movement of life

“Work as if you don’t need the money.
Love as if you’ve never been hurt
And dance as though no one is watching.”

-Larry and Chic Todaro

Filed under: life, love, quotes, work